I’ve started keeping a word book. Instead of using Mr Norman as a human dictionary (his diction is really amazing, ooeer), I’ve now elected to haul my arse off the sofa, look up the word myself and then write it in my little pink book for safekeeping.

I met up with my friend Laura the other day and she told me she was off to a pub quiz later with 2 ex-members of Suede and she was dreading it. CANNOT say I envied her that little outing. According to Laura, they sit there in stoney silence the whole time, but they are good at quiz (apparently), so I told her that my sister used to work at that funny little place, the NME and down the pub at lunchtime she would sit there, among her gauche workmates, but alone with her thoughts (she just as well be alone), ‘Arrrrrrrrrrggghhhhhhhh, somebody say something!!!’

Which beggars the question, why are there so many people with such appalling social skills? (Answers on a postcard, if you haven’t got social skills)